Let me tell you a few things about my Dad…
2/25/25
My Dad – my namesake – is 84 years old. You wouldn’t know it to look at him or to talk to him. Sure, he’s lost a step or two and isn’t able to do everything he used to, but he still comes pretty close. Thankfully, after several years of trying to convince him, he managed to let go of a few things, allowed others to do more for him, and pays for some work I’m sure he could still do if he really tried. But, he’s 84, he’s comfortable financially, and he doesn’t need to try those things anymore.
You see my Dad is very ‘handy’ – much more handy than I’ll ever be. He didn’t have a choice. He grew up poor, married young, had a family young, and worked long days to put food on the table and a roof over our heads. He didn’t have the luxury of hiring others to do what he didn’t want to do or didn’t know how — instead, he learned … he figured it out. Plumbing repairs — he learned it. Roofing repairs — he figured it out. Installing a split-rail fence — he dug the posts so deep and secure, it survived a flood and held back logs washed from an upstream mill. Electrical work, construction, growing a garden, adding a wood stove to his workshop — he learned it; he figured it out.
Dad completed high school – but just barely (as he says it). It wasn’t because he wasn’t intelligent enough to do well in school; it was just never a focus for him. I’ve seen him come up with ideas to repair or improve things around the house and heard examples from his jobs where he had to ‘engineer’ a solution to a problem or to improve a process — not by learning it in a book but by figuring it out. But, in his school days, he was busy working, hunting, growing and selling food from his garden (to the school system, for one). He was never going to be college-bound; he was destined to work a back-breaking blue-collar job. Even without an advanced education, he did quite well for himself — worked independently to get his electrician’s license, learned how to use computers as would eventually be required for his job, provided well for five children, made it possible for those of us that wanted to go to college to do so – and two of us did. Now, in his later years, he recounts the memories of some of those jobs each time I visit him — sometimes he shares something new, sometimes repeats stories… but that’s okay. I like to hear about them and like to hear the pride in his voice. Truth is, he’s possibly told me these stories when I was younger too and I just don’t remember them. I may have been too busy with my own life or too self-absorbed to listen and retain it — or maybe he was too busy working most of these years that he’s never really had time to reminisce until now. Either way, it’s interesting to hear about his younger years… about hitch-hiking to jobs, about lifting frozen sides of beef on and off of trucks, moving heavy bags of grain and other products off railway cars, etc.
Dad grew up in a small town in West Virginia. He came from a coal-mining family… his granddad, his dad, his uncle – all miners. There weren’t a lot of other opportunities. Dad eventually became a coal miner as well. But, he held other jobs along the way and during his time as a miner. It was common in the coal mines for layoffs to occur or miners to go on strike. Dad couldn’t afford to just sit and wait it out; so, he found whatever work he could during the down times. He was a butcher at a local grocer, he worked construction building condos, and he blasted dynamite for road construction crews. But, the majority of his working years was spent in the coal mines in various roles — as a worker, a foreman, a ‘fire boss’, etc. He would walk several miles each night in conditions I can only imagine… for years – probably the reason he doesn’t look like he’s 84 today. He would drive to work (typically more than an hour each way and often in rough West Virginia mountain weather conditions), work a 12-hour shift, drive back home, sleep a few hours and get up and do it all over again. On his ‘days off’, he would work on projects around the house – repairs, improvements, honey-do lists. I don’t recall ever hearing him complain – grumble like we all do, sure; but not complain. Even today as he reminisces, he talks about how he always liked to work — I think he just never knew any different. He’s always been a hard worker… providing for his family and his mom before that.
Dad finally got to retire 19 years ago, but even that didn’t come easy at the time – or since.
- He was due to retire at the end of January 2006. He worked his last shift before the New Year’s holiday weekend at the end of December. On January 2nd, a day or two before Dad was to return to work, an explosion occurred (known as the ‘Sago Mine disaster’) on the first day the mine was open after the holiday. A lightning strike caused an explosion that trapped the first 13 miners to enter that day (after the initial inspection by the fire boss) – eventually killing all but one of them. Some of these were men that my Dad knew well – had worked with for years. He never went back to work in the mines again. His career was over and he retired – not with the goodbye he deserved but with the loss of friends / co-workers. In the end, he was lucky… all those years in the mines, working in challenging and dangerous conditions where safety truly had to be a top priority just to survive – and many of those years, his job was to ensure the safety of his crew… he was lucky he wasn’t there on a day when 12 others were killed due to circumstances that would have been beyond his control – beyond proper safety precautions – a lightning strike in the wrong place. He was that close to the worst possible ending with only one month until retirement. He was lucky; we were lucky.
- For several years, Dad was able to enjoy the typical retirement. He worked on projects around the house, performed handyman jobs for others, enjoyed hobbies such as woodworking (self-taught — we have several pieces he’s made like the WV clock in my office), did some traveling to visit kids/grandkids, and enjoyed visits from the same. But, after a few years, some changes began to become noticeable with my Mom – some loss of cognitive abilities. While my Mom and this issue is a topic for another day, the toll this has taken on my Dad has been hard to watch. I’m not sure what he would have done over these past 10 years or so if circumstances were different – what hobbies he would be involved in, what friendships and social activities would still exist (he has always been the more social of the two) – but I know what he has done over those years — take care of Mom, be there for her, try to maintain a routine for her. He talks about it being a lot of work but he doesn’t complain. He just says “she’d do the same for me if she could”.
Let me tell you one final thing about my Dad… I respect him more than I can ever imagine someone would respect me. I’m not saying that to speak poorly of myself. I just think he’s earned it more than I ever could. His life has been different than mine. He provided for me in a way that gave me a head start in life. He never had any such advantages; he earned his opportunities and made the most of them — not because he had dreams of retiring early or taking lavish vacations, or owning luxury cars or homes — but to provide for his family and be proud of what resulted from his hard work. He’s earned respect; he’s got mine.
next blog entry…
[6/26/25] Let me tell you a few things about my wife…
previous blog entry…
[2/21/25] I am old and retired, but I don’t feel that I should appear to others like I’m old and retired…
RetiredInIndiana 