Exactly six months ago, I retired… (part 4)

8/16/24

Exactly six months ago, I retired… without a defined purpose for my retirement years. If I have any regrets about retiring, it would only be that I didn’t adequately prepare for the non-financial part (the ‘softer side’ of retirement as some experts refer to it) as well as we did for the financial part. Now, don’t get me wrong – I don’t regret retiring at all (it would be silly to say that I do) and I really don’t even have a huge regret about the lack of prep for the ‘softer side’ either (since I still have time to figure it all out), but I should have been more ready. It’s not like I wasn’t aware of the need for this preparation – I‘ve read many articles / blogs / books and listened to several discussions with experts on the topic (even advice from the financial planning team we’ve been working with). But, I had spent the last nine years of my career working from home, so I expected the transition for me would be easier than for others. It would essentially be the same as during my working years except that I could fill my time at home in other ways – with things I actually like – and there were lots of things I like. I wasn’t going to be losing the social aspect of work that most other retirees lose, since I wasn’t in an office setting or traveling to customers on any kind of frequent basis. I wasn’t concerned about losing my identify or sense of self by giving up a job I had done for so long, basically because I didn’t really identify myself by my job anyway – it was a job I did because it was necessary to have a job and one that provided for me (for us) – nothing more.

Nonetheless, I have found myself wanting to have something meaningful to do – a purpose – and not just hobbies (which are fine and something I do want and need). I didn’t feel this way immediately – I do manage to fill my time and most days go more quickly than I would expect – but, as the dust has settled, the realization that I don’t have a purpose or a plan to identify one has crept in. I’ve become aware of this a couple times recently when I expected to be confronted by others hearing of my retirement for the first time – with the question of why I retired early or what I plan to do with my time having retired at such an early age. I guess I expected they would assume that I had a plan. The reality is that I haven’t actually been so directly confronted about it yet – but my expectation of others’ expectations of me has still led me to this point.

When I say I want to have a ‘purpose’, I don’t mean that I want to change the world or be recognized as philanthropist of the year. I haven’t had these goals for the first 53 years of my life and don’t feel the need to have them now. I just want to do more than pass time, wait for my wife to come home from work, and decide what/where dinner and the weekend will consist of. [NOTE: Don’t get me wrong… dinner, drinks, weekends, vacations, etc. are all important to us and valuable contributors to our enjoyment of life. I anticipate blogging a lot about all of these things going forward. When my retirement changes to our retirement, I expect these will be a significant part of our retirement years.] But, for now while it’s just my retirement, I also want a challenge – something  to occupy my mind, something to analyze / evaluate as I’ve done much of my 53 years personally and professionally. It’s still a work in progress and this blog is part of it for sure. But, here are a few other thoughts about potential challenges / interests that I’ve had over the first 6 months of retirement and their status as of today…

  • I had an itch for about one week in retirement so far to find a part-time job or a contract job. My daughter has done part-time consulting for 2 different customers over the past couple years and has been paid quite well (especially for one of them). This isn’t what I was looking to do exactly, but I did investigate sites like Fiverr where you can promote your services or respond to requests for contract services. But, I quickly found that the types of tools I used and things I did in my job for many years and still do in my personal life DO NOT translate well to the gig economy. The services I could offer would easily be performed more quickly (and much better) by the many others posting their skills on these sites. Not to sound like I’m more irrelevant than I am or just an old dog struggling to learn new tricks, but I don’t have any interest in learning new tricks at this stage of my life or trying to keep up-to-date enough to be anywhere near competitive in this market.
    • I had made a slideshow for my parents 50th wedding anniversary more than a decade ago and saved it for others on DVD’s – yes, actual physical discs. It is even more technologically outdated than it already sounds and the quality is poor – especially compared to what school aged children could probably create today with their phones or tablets. One of my sisters recently asked about creating an updated slide show and I had to laugh actually. Instead, I suggested she should turn to one of our nieces or nephews in their 20’s / 30’s that could create a much better product more easily and more quickly than I. As an example, my 30-something niece at our recent family reunion came up with the idea for a video, recorded it, edited it, added text and music, and shared it with little effort or experience at all – at least that I know of. I’m not saying I couldn’t do that – eventually, but I don’t have the tools at my fingertips. In reality, it’s probably quite easy and resources are likely readily available. But, I don’t know that and don’t know that I want to need to know that. Trying to compete in a gig economy would basically be the same to me as this.
    • I also investigated actual job opportunities during this brief period of questioning my retirement existence and feeling a desire to earn extra fun money. I looked at all the typical job posting sites for opportunities that might meet my criteria (limiting as they were) – remote, part-time, flexible as in work when I want without a specific obligation for weekly hours, etc. Not surprisingly, the options were few and far between – and many sounded more suspect than legit. Luckily, that itch only lasted about a week and I’ve moved on.
  • Owning / managing rental properties (residential duplexes / apartments or vacation condos)… this is an itch I’ve had for MANY years and still do. The older I get though, the less risk I’d be willing to take for this and the less likely it will ever become a reality. I definitely would have the time and we could swing the right opportunity financially, but this remains a back burner item for the time being.
  • Starting a blog about retirement… well, today is DAY 1. This is actually something my wife and I have discussed for probably more than a year now – not so much as a blog to share with others and/or something to consider monetizing, but as our own record of bucket list items, fun day trip or vacation ideas, records of some of our favorite restaurants, local bands, etc. We will see where this goes now that I’ve started putting pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard).

Now that I’ve listed all the things I’ve considered and postponed or abandoned, I should probably focus on what I HAVE actually been doing for 6 months. Even though none of these are things that I would ultimately consider my purpose in retirement, there have been plenty of activities – many of which have been part of my retirement to-do list all along and some of which I’ve been fortunate to be retired and available to participate. In six months – 183 days – I have…

  • spent a week vacationing in Fort Lauderdale FL with additional stops in Marietta GA, Macon GA and Bowling Green KY
  • drove a rental van from Chicago to a suburb of Baltimore to move my son for a new job (which included 2 trips to Chicago and 6 days total with stays in Maryland and Pennsylvania)
  • went to Michigan multiple times, including a day-trip with my wife & mother-in-law and several overnight stays with my wife (in New Buffalo, Ludington, Pentwater, Saugatuck) celebrating my retirement and our anniversary
  • went on a short vacation across several states, which included a cabin stay in Ohio, visiting my son in Maryland, a short stay in West Virginia, and bringing my parents back to our house to visit for 4 nights
  • went on a cruise of the Kalamazoo River, Kalamazoo Lake, and Lake Michigan from Saugatuck MI
  • visited my parents in West Virginia for 5 nights (along with my daughter) while my sister / brother-in-law that live with them were on a getaway of their own
  • spent 3 nights in a cabin at Blackwater Falls State Park in West Virginia for a family reunion (with 22 of us)
  • hiked trails in Ludington State Park (MI), Hocking Hills State Park (OH), Blackwater Falls State Park (WV) and several local ones in Indiana
  • enjoyed convertible ‘cruises’ with the wife
  • listened to live music more than a dozen times, including Stevie Nicks, Journey, Toto, and several local bands
  • hung out with my neighbor and several other friends at a local mug club most Monday evenings
  • went out for dinner / drinks (and sometimes music) on several occasions with friends / neighbors, my brother-in-law & his girlfriend, my daughter & her boyfriend, several nieces and nephews, and one of my sisters
  • went to several local ‘food truck rallies’ & local street fairs (usually with live music) and often with others
  • toured vacation condos (because you just never know when you’ll stumble on the right one) and several new homes locally during ‘showcase’ events (just out of curiosity – and by the way, prices sure have skyrocketed!)
  • went to a local minor league baseball game with fireworks
  • met with the wife’s siblings & families on a couple occasions (for holidays and once to ‘bet on the ponies’)
  • played Euchre almost weekly with my mother-in-law (and brother-in-law usually) – a tradition we’ve continued since my father-in-law passed away a few years ago
  • had dinner out with my daughter (some with her boyfriend) for birthdays, Mother’s Day, and Father’s Day
  • had dinner & game night almost weekly at our house with my daughter – including playing WingSpan
  • went to a couple movies at local theaters and watched several more on streaming services
  • went to 3 musicals / performances at the local theatre, some with my daughter and some meeting friends
  • helped my daughter with several tasks at her home including mowing the lawn and repairing a leaky sink
  • went to the driving range several times with a friend, alone, and with my wife
  • played pool and darts with friends several times and with my Dad during his short visit
  • went to a couple grad parties with several of my wife’s aunts, uncles, and cousins
  • did 3 crossword puzzles nearly every day for the last 2 ½ months – to ‘keep the mind sharp’ 😉
  • and  — I have written entries for my new blog for 1 day!

All in all, I’d have to say it’s been a pretty busy six months – even without a purpose!

[top of page]

[return to blog home page]

next blog entry…
[8/27/24] I am old and retired, but I don’t feel that I should appear to others like I’m old and retired…

previous blog entry…
[8/16/24] Exactly six months ago, I retired… (part 3)